There is ABSOLUTELY no one like YOU in this world. We all have something unique to say, to create, to offer, and to teach others. If you follow your heart and get in touch with your soul, it will lead you to endless opportunities. Your dreams, talents, passions and desires are your clues. Don't discount them. Instead, honor them and you will find happiness in all that you do.
I have had amazing teachers, advisors, and guides in my lifetime, as I am sure many of you have had as well. I have learned many facts, ways of thinking, knowledge and wisdom and now I know, more than ever, to not only follow my logical and rational mind, but, to follow my heart and trust that it will lead me to the right place.
As a child, I always loved learning. I was one of those few kids that loved school. Of course, I didn’t like the many hours of homework, the competitive nature of the classroom setting or the rote studies, but I did love to learn when the teachers presented their subjects in an interesting and enjoyable way; through multi-media, art, storytelling, team projects and other opportunities where I was able to use my creativity to better understand the subjects. I took this love of learning to heart and, later in my life, became a family educator, using unique and enjoyable experiences to teach others. My passion for education led me to help start educational institutions as well, and I have spent the last 15 years working diligently with others to help create and build them. Never understanding my path as I was participating in it, I delved into leading, organizing and raising money…anything I could do to help make these institutions wonderful places for children, parents and adult learners.
Having examined my path in depth for the last few years now, through guidance and hard work, it’s no wonder that I can look back and see how much I loved growing up at my Father’s Jewish Day Camp, an exceptionally fun and creative environment. I have been in the role of a camper, counselor, and director throughout my life. From owning and being the program director of Camp Summertime many years ago, to organizing family retreats for business organizations and institutions, I have always had “camp” in my blood. My entire family loves camp as well, and together, we have attended many family weekend retreats and Bruinwoods Family Camp for the last 10 years. Taking a queue from my childhood camp experiences we have even created “Camp Gootnick” on many occasions in our home and family life as well. I have also approached my volunteer and professional work with a fun and positive attitude when planning events and activities.
My life has also been focused on communication as well. Not only do I have a B.A from UCLA in Communication (which, quite frankly, taught me nothing about true “communication”) and I am trained as a mediator, my love and passion has always been communicating and connecting with others. I have always enjoyed talking to friends, discussing and sharing our experiences in life, whether it is our careers, single or married life, the challenges and joys of parenting or ongoing relationships with our family and those around us.
My other “gift” has been my deep sense of awareness and spirituality. I have taken the opportunities that have been presented to me to learn more about my inner self and what I want in my life.
Mixing my passion for education, fun and creativity, communication and spirituality has lead me to my true path….helping others heal and lift themselves to greater heights through joyful experiences and knowledge.
Creating an institute to learn and grow as individuals and families by connecting to each other through positive experiences and education is my mission. My vision is to empower people to help them find joy and “heaven on earth” and, therefore, create a better world.
My newest venture is The Renewal Institute, a place where “Individuals and Families are empowered through education and experiences to change the world”. I will be creating this Institute together with my dear friend, Nancy Tylim, who shares an extremely similar vision. We will be offering workshops, discussion groups and experiences to help open minds and hearts, so that everyone who participates can see themselves as unique individuals and discover how their paths play a role in what their purpose in this world can be. We are launching The Renewal Institute in established communities, such as synagogues and other organizations, at the beginning of 2010! I continue on my path and I believe I am moving in the right direction. It is a constant learning process for me.
Know that YOU are a unique and amazing individual with your own path…follow your heart … have courage, choose to take risks and your passions and gifts will show you the way!
Here’s to making 2010 a gateway to new possibilities and opportunities. May the toast for the New Year be to fulfilling all of your dreams!
Thursday, December 31, 2009
Tuesday, December 8, 2009
Passport To Purpose
Vacation, Travel, or Journey. …. Pleasure, Adventure or Soul Searching. They all may be important to you throughout your life, but there are differences between them. “Vacations” can be a time of bonding with our spouses and/or family, relaxing and fun… and that is wonderful. “Traveling” can give us experiences that we may not receive on a vacation; it expands our knowledge of the world. We learn history, are exposed to different cultures, participate in memorable activities, meet interesting people and taste unique foods. Through travel, we use our senses and open up our minds… but the question arises….what about our hearts? A“Journey” has a deeper purpose. A journey is about EXPLORATION and about change within us. If we make a decision to go on a journey somewhere throughout the world, we can see that it can change us in ways that we cannot even imagine.
A few weeks ago, I returned from a trip to Peru. I traveled for a week with an organization called AJWS (American Jewish World Service). This experience was not about imparting any religious beliefs or about transmitting our American values onto other people. This experience was about recognizing how people help each other in various ways within their own environments and how we can support their personal and social change, which, in turn, creates a better world for all of us.
I was blessed to have been able to witness what AJWS does in the Latin American region. Peru is a developing country with many economic and social challenges. Our main purpose was to visit grass-roots organizations ( NGO’s or non- governmental organizations) that have created successful ways to help one another with limited resources. I was enthralled as I listened to stories from women with HIV who are becoming empowered through their support groups and are advocating for themselves to receive the care they deserve, indigenous people along the Amazon River who are rising from the violence in their homes and becoming educated on their sexual and reproductive rights, African-Peruvians who are discriminated against because of the color of their skin who are teaching their children to accept and celebrate their identity, young children in an impoverished community day care center who are learning team building and leadership skills through sports, and disabled women who have created a craft business that helps them to become more economically self-sustaining, and, through the support of each other, feel more beautiful in their own bodies.
Yes, meeting and talking with these amazing people altered and awakened my soul and, along with the final days of my travels, brought me to a new understanding of myself. After traveling with the AJWS group of supporters and professionals, my path led me to the Andes Mountains, where I toured and learned of the ancient Inca people’s extraordinary systems of learning, beliefs and community in a beautiful city called Cuzco (meaning “the center of the world”). I traveled by train through the Sacred Valley and was able to wander, explore then sit quietly to pause and meditate above the ruins of Machu Pichu. I made some personal discoveries as I sat still in this amazing ancient sanctuary and my inner world shifted as I experienced those moments in time. I knew I was supposed to be right where I was. Peru had been calling me and I jumped aboard. I went alone, not knowing anyone on the trip (but loving everyone I met), and not knowing how my kids and my husband would survive without me (they did just fine… even with injuries and flu!) and I came back with a heart that was more open to the world.
All I can say is this: Go where you are must go. Experience what you are must experience. Risk what you must risk. Journey where you must journey… and quite possibly, your soul will shift and your heart will open up more to the world. You will get a stamp in your passport; not only from the particular country that you visited, but a stamp of purpose on your soul as well.
Ask yourself if it is possible to go to a place that you have wanted to visit next year in 2010. If you can make it happen….take the journey!
A few weeks ago, I returned from a trip to Peru. I traveled for a week with an organization called AJWS (American Jewish World Service). This experience was not about imparting any religious beliefs or about transmitting our American values onto other people. This experience was about recognizing how people help each other in various ways within their own environments and how we can support their personal and social change, which, in turn, creates a better world for all of us.
I was blessed to have been able to witness what AJWS does in the Latin American region. Peru is a developing country with many economic and social challenges. Our main purpose was to visit grass-roots organizations ( NGO’s or non- governmental organizations) that have created successful ways to help one another with limited resources. I was enthralled as I listened to stories from women with HIV who are becoming empowered through their support groups and are advocating for themselves to receive the care they deserve, indigenous people along the Amazon River who are rising from the violence in their homes and becoming educated on their sexual and reproductive rights, African-Peruvians who are discriminated against because of the color of their skin who are teaching their children to accept and celebrate their identity, young children in an impoverished community day care center who are learning team building and leadership skills through sports, and disabled women who have created a craft business that helps them to become more economically self-sustaining, and, through the support of each other, feel more beautiful in their own bodies.
Yes, meeting and talking with these amazing people altered and awakened my soul and, along with the final days of my travels, brought me to a new understanding of myself. After traveling with the AJWS group of supporters and professionals, my path led me to the Andes Mountains, where I toured and learned of the ancient Inca people’s extraordinary systems of learning, beliefs and community in a beautiful city called Cuzco (meaning “the center of the world”). I traveled by train through the Sacred Valley and was able to wander, explore then sit quietly to pause and meditate above the ruins of Machu Pichu. I made some personal discoveries as I sat still in this amazing ancient sanctuary and my inner world shifted as I experienced those moments in time. I knew I was supposed to be right where I was. Peru had been calling me and I jumped aboard. I went alone, not knowing anyone on the trip (but loving everyone I met), and not knowing how my kids and my husband would survive without me (they did just fine… even with injuries and flu!) and I came back with a heart that was more open to the world.
All I can say is this: Go where you are must go. Experience what you are must experience. Risk what you must risk. Journey where you must journey… and quite possibly, your soul will shift and your heart will open up more to the world. You will get a stamp in your passport; not only from the particular country that you visited, but a stamp of purpose on your soul as well.
Ask yourself if it is possible to go to a place that you have wanted to visit next year in 2010. If you can make it happen….take the journey!
Thursday, September 24, 2009
What is it to Pray?
Prayer is a complex, multi-layered activity. The Jewish sages referred to prayer in Hebrew as avodah, service, to describe the service of sacrifice in the ancient Holy Temple in Jerusalem. However, since the destruction of the Second Temple in 70 A.D., prayer became the Jewish people’s primary means of “connecting” with God.
Avodah also means work, or giving something of ourselves to God...however you define God for yourself. But what benefit could God derive from our prayers? How do our prayers serve the Divine? The Hebrew word l'hitpallel means to pray. The root word, pallel, actually means to judge, clarifies, differentiate or decide. In one tense of the word, the subject acts upon him/herself. Therefore, prayer is about self-definition and establishing some level of inner clarity. During prayer, one may be able to clarify his/her relationship with God and with the world, thus opening a clearer channel of communication with the Divine.
Opening up the "Channels" is the purpose of transformation or change within oneself. The more you change or transform and become true to yourself, the more connected to the divine and the world you become. Your relationships with your family, friends and people in your life become stronger, more fulfilling and you are able to give and receive more love.
Whether you choose to be in a synagogue with your community this Yom Kippur and/or choose to give yourself a quiet moment in a tranquil place of your own, or engage in both practices, talk to God. If you can, ask for forgiveness, forgive others and open up your heart. Allow the messages through prayer to touch your soul.
I have found many ways to pray throughout the last year that have been introspective, joyful and insightful for me. I have experienced prayer through chanting, free movement, breath work and various types of meditations. I have also found that prayer with others creates more positive energy, and, quite possibly, it helps “shift” the universe in some way. I would like to believe that it does.
In the most challenging times in my life, when I honestly felt that I couldn't’ overcome my fears and shadows, I spoke to God in my own way and said “Heneni”, which in Hebrew means “here I am”. Allowing myself to engage in this communication has transformed me in ways I cannot completely explain, only to say that it has "opened up my channels" even more.
I urge you, in the upcoming year, to experience different avenues of thought and prayer. You may feel comfortable with certain experiences of self reflection and prayer, and some, you may not. You have your own path to explore...and you have the choice to explore it. I wish you the courage to face your challenges, and the radiance of light that it may bring you.
Avodah also means work, or giving something of ourselves to God...however you define God for yourself. But what benefit could God derive from our prayers? How do our prayers serve the Divine? The Hebrew word l'hitpallel means to pray. The root word, pallel, actually means to judge, clarifies, differentiate or decide. In one tense of the word, the subject acts upon him/herself. Therefore, prayer is about self-definition and establishing some level of inner clarity. During prayer, one may be able to clarify his/her relationship with God and with the world, thus opening a clearer channel of communication with the Divine.
Opening up the "Channels" is the purpose of transformation or change within oneself. The more you change or transform and become true to yourself, the more connected to the divine and the world you become. Your relationships with your family, friends and people in your life become stronger, more fulfilling and you are able to give and receive more love.
Whether you choose to be in a synagogue with your community this Yom Kippur and/or choose to give yourself a quiet moment in a tranquil place of your own, or engage in both practices, talk to God. If you can, ask for forgiveness, forgive others and open up your heart. Allow the messages through prayer to touch your soul.
I have found many ways to pray throughout the last year that have been introspective, joyful and insightful for me. I have experienced prayer through chanting, free movement, breath work and various types of meditations. I have also found that prayer with others creates more positive energy, and, quite possibly, it helps “shift” the universe in some way. I would like to believe that it does.
In the most challenging times in my life, when I honestly felt that I couldn't’ overcome my fears and shadows, I spoke to God in my own way and said “Heneni”, which in Hebrew means “here I am”. Allowing myself to engage in this communication has transformed me in ways I cannot completely explain, only to say that it has "opened up my channels" even more.
I urge you, in the upcoming year, to experience different avenues of thought and prayer. You may feel comfortable with certain experiences of self reflection and prayer, and some, you may not. You have your own path to explore...and you have the choice to explore it. I wish you the courage to face your challenges, and the radiance of light that it may bring you.
Friday, September 11, 2009
Are our children OURS?
You are probably saying, “What a crazy question? Of course they are”! But, I am going to argue the contrary, please hear me out.
My oldest son, Daniel, just left for college. He went to the East Coast, to New York University (NYU) in the middle of Manhattan. I still can’t believe it, but it is reality! I have shed my tears, I will miss him tremendously. He is a great person, a creative and talented individual and I truly enjoy being with him. I was talking to another Mom on the phone before we left for New York to help him move into the dorms. She was also saying goodbye to her two children at the same time (a boy and girl set of twins) and I said to her “we are so lucky to have had the privilege of raising them, but we have to set them free….they are not ours.” Where did that come from? Were they my words? I thought about it for a moment and I knew the words were correct.
Most of the past 18 years, I believed that my kids were privileged to have a Mom like me…loving, devoted, far from perfect, but always trying to do my best and do what was right for them. Yes, they have been privileged to have me as their mom, but I have been equally, if not more, privileged to have had them. There is a reason that we are together in this lifetime, a reason our children are in our lives and us in theirs.
Could it be possible that the souls of each one of us have a purpose for being together: the purpose not only to learn, but grow, transform and become better people in the world in which we live? Most likely we share some of the same life lessons with our children and we need each other to become aware of these lessons and learn from each other.
Genetically, our children seem to be ours. We cannot argue with the color of their hair and the shape of their eyes, the way they walk or talk, the little mole on the right side of their chin that their grandfather has in the same place or the habit of sleeping in a strange position that only their great uncle seems to do. Of course, those characteristics or behaviors can be passed down to us through our DNA from the generations past. But does the genetic connection completely make our children ours to own or possess?
What about the differences that we see that we cannot explain...their passion for a certain type of music, or their ability to dance or see artwork in their own way, to even paint a unique picture that only their minds and hands could create? What about the ways they converse with their friends, special passions and interests they enjoy or strong opinions that don’t resemble anyone in the family? What about an intense fear or an emotion that they display that is hard for us to understand because we have never felt that way before?
Are our children ours? Or are they God’s gift to us? We say it, but do we really believe it? If we do believe that they are a gift, then we need to support them and love them, but let them fall down, fail and learn their lessons when they are ready to do so. We need to take responsibility for our roles, our behaviors and what we teach them, but we cannot take responsibility for everything about them and definitely not completely who they are inside. Their spirit is theirs. We can do our best to learn from them as we continually grow as individuals ourselves, and teach them what we know from our own life experiences, but we need to realize that they have their own souls and are on their own journey. We, as parents, are given the privilege of having them in our lives, raising them and showing them the way.
Allow them to be themselves; it could be through a small action today or a trip to college tomorrow.
My oldest son, Daniel, just left for college. He went to the East Coast, to New York University (NYU) in the middle of Manhattan. I still can’t believe it, but it is reality! I have shed my tears, I will miss him tremendously. He is a great person, a creative and talented individual and I truly enjoy being with him. I was talking to another Mom on the phone before we left for New York to help him move into the dorms. She was also saying goodbye to her two children at the same time (a boy and girl set of twins) and I said to her “we are so lucky to have had the privilege of raising them, but we have to set them free….they are not ours.” Where did that come from? Were they my words? I thought about it for a moment and I knew the words were correct.
Most of the past 18 years, I believed that my kids were privileged to have a Mom like me…loving, devoted, far from perfect, but always trying to do my best and do what was right for them. Yes, they have been privileged to have me as their mom, but I have been equally, if not more, privileged to have had them. There is a reason that we are together in this lifetime, a reason our children are in our lives and us in theirs.
Could it be possible that the souls of each one of us have a purpose for being together: the purpose not only to learn, but grow, transform and become better people in the world in which we live? Most likely we share some of the same life lessons with our children and we need each other to become aware of these lessons and learn from each other.
Genetically, our children seem to be ours. We cannot argue with the color of their hair and the shape of their eyes, the way they walk or talk, the little mole on the right side of their chin that their grandfather has in the same place or the habit of sleeping in a strange position that only their great uncle seems to do. Of course, those characteristics or behaviors can be passed down to us through our DNA from the generations past. But does the genetic connection completely make our children ours to own or possess?
What about the differences that we see that we cannot explain...their passion for a certain type of music, or their ability to dance or see artwork in their own way, to even paint a unique picture that only their minds and hands could create? What about the ways they converse with their friends, special passions and interests they enjoy or strong opinions that don’t resemble anyone in the family? What about an intense fear or an emotion that they display that is hard for us to understand because we have never felt that way before?
Are our children ours? Or are they God’s gift to us? We say it, but do we really believe it? If we do believe that they are a gift, then we need to support them and love them, but let them fall down, fail and learn their lessons when they are ready to do so. We need to take responsibility for our roles, our behaviors and what we teach them, but we cannot take responsibility for everything about them and definitely not completely who they are inside. Their spirit is theirs. We can do our best to learn from them as we continually grow as individuals ourselves, and teach them what we know from our own life experiences, but we need to realize that they have their own souls and are on their own journey. We, as parents, are given the privilege of having them in our lives, raising them and showing them the way.
Allow them to be themselves; it could be through a small action today or a trip to college tomorrow.
Friday, September 4, 2009
Does the Universe Talk to you? Listen!
Last week was the first day of school for my teenage twin boys. They are 15 ½, just got their driving permits and started their sophomore year in High School. I have tried to make them responsible for chores around the house, cleaning their rooms, and completing their homework, but, I admit, I have not been so good at the “making their own lunches” activity. Maybe I held onto that one to still feel loved as a mother…or maybe I was afraid that they would not eat well and get sick (a situation that probably would not have occurred, and if it did, they would have survived and learned from it) or, maybe all of their procrastination in the morning led me to try to keep them from not being late to school (another consequence that they should own themselves). Whatever my fears and acts of protection have been, I knew that today was the day for me to STOP making those lunches!
My “not wanting the first day of school to exist” sons, slowly strolled down to the kitchen with only 10 minutes left to eat breakfast and get out the door. I said to them, “okay, one more day, I will do it…it’s the first day of school”! I made a turkey sandwich for one of them and I reached into the drawer for the tin foil and I sliced my finger on the sharp edge of a box of plastic wrap in the same drawer. Then, I went into the pantry to get the peanut butter. I grabbed the Nutella, and the top came off and rolled down my pants in a trail on the way to the floor. Chocolate all over my new jeans, and no time to change!
The question came to my mind … Was this situation just a coincidence? Did it just happen? OR was the universe talking to me and saying “don’t make those sandwiches for them!?” I could have cursed under my breath and gone about my business getting them to school, but, I realized that it was time to change, let go, move forward and shift out of my old patterns.
Have you ever looked at your day or week and really concentrated on what was happening to you? Items are lost, broken or taken from you, the internet keeps going down, you can’t connect by phone, you are easily angered by other people; you repeatedly get hurt emotionally or physically. How are others treating you…your family, your friends, your co-workers? The messages from the universe are hidden in the words and actions of the people in your life, the new souls that you encounter, and the experiences you have. Ask yourself…what do I need to see in myself in order for the people around me to act differently towards me? Usually we blame the people in our lives. I know…I do it all the time, but, when I look and listen to the messages that come up for me in my life, they are not hidden anymore; in fact, I can see that they are present for a reason; to learn and grow from them. I do not like to see these conclusions about myself; yet, I smile when I discover them. I can’t believe they were actually shown to me.
Yes, it is painful to see my own faults, but, when I am able to open my eyes and become aware of the messages I am receiving, I can then do the work to change. The magical part of it all is when I shift, the people in my life shift towards me as well. That’s the power of positive energy at work. Hidden messages are blessings in disguise! Listen to them and, if you choose, take them from the hidden(the dark) to the known (the light).
Monday, August 24, 2009
Does Money Buy Happiness or Pleasure?
I went to listen to a lecture a couple of weeks ago at a friend’s house where a Psychologist was invited from Columbia University to speak about “money and happiness” and the correlation between them. He presented many different graphs and studies and, in conclusion, as the audience grappled with the information set forth, money does not buy us happiness. What a surprise! What a revelation! I am sure that is what you thought the conclusion would already be. The interesting point he made, though, is that money does give us pleasure. Huh? Happiness and Pleasure…I thought they were the same thing? But, as I sat there listening, I asked myself, is there a difference between happiness and pleasure?
I believe happiness is a state of being…an internal feeling that is deep inside of us. Happiness SHOULD be a consistent state of being that we have throughout our everyday lives. Happiness is a feeling of bliss, contentment, no regrets of the past and no fear of the future. It is what is called “living in the now” allowing life to happen and accepting every experience that is set forth for you and from you. Pleasure, on the other hand, seems to come and go….it tends to be more external. We derive pleasure…as a feeling of satisfaction. This type of satisfaction may stem from the comforts we are able to attain, our nice homes, comfortable cars, stylish clothing, fun activities and enjoyable vacations. But these pleasures are fleeting and sometimes too far in between. The question arises: where and how do we find happiness?
Happiness is within the soul…it is a deeper sensation and state of being. We want happiness, but how do we attain it? The answer is not simple….it takes learning, living and loving…mistakes we make and experiences that we have. We can only find happiness through self introspection and transformation …no teacher can teach us in a classroom, no person can tell us about it…only we can make it happen through our own personal discoveries and revelations.
The question arises: What do you currently spend most of your money on… pleasure or happiness? Make a list and you will most likely see, in terms of expenses, we all spend most of it on pleasure. The truth is: if you want to move towards a state of happiness, start spending your money on you. Pursue activities and experiences that make you grow, develop and look inward and reach into your soul. Invest in your inner self….you are definitely worth the expense!
Saturday, August 8, 2009
What do we fear the most… The Darkness or the Light?
When I was a little girl, and I would suddenly wake up in the dark from a dream in the middle of the night and feel scared and anxious. I would run across the hallway, wake my parents up for comfort and protection. They would give me a kiss and a hug and tell me everything was going to be ok. I would go back in my own bed, but I would still feel the fear and I would eventually fall back asleep. What was I trying to seek protection from?
Maybe what we are trying to protect ourselves from is just that…ourselves. We fear the content of our dreams and what they are truly telling us.
Can insomnia, difficulty falling asleep or waking up in the middle of the night be fear of the messages that we receive through our dreams?
Are dreams the way the Divine talks to us…gives us messages?
Are we afraid to listen?
Is it possible that we do not want to see the messages in our dreams because it may force us to change?
Is change within ourselves moving us towards the light…or what is called enlightenment?
Maybe we are not really afraid of the dark…but afraid of the light. We fear the shift, the transformation of our souls. We want to stay the same and have everyone around us change for our greater happiness. Searching your own soul can bring you closer to the light.
These are some questions to ponder. Know that you may need to wrestle with change in order to have a peaceful night sleep.
*I have updated my blog..shorter bits of shared experiences and wisdom with more questions to ponder rather than answers. I hope you give yourself a chance to think about the questions that I raise… I have given much thought to them myself.
Maybe what we are trying to protect ourselves from is just that…ourselves. We fear the content of our dreams and what they are truly telling us.
Can insomnia, difficulty falling asleep or waking up in the middle of the night be fear of the messages that we receive through our dreams?
Are dreams the way the Divine talks to us…gives us messages?
Are we afraid to listen?
Is it possible that we do not want to see the messages in our dreams because it may force us to change?
Is change within ourselves moving us towards the light…or what is called enlightenment?
Maybe we are not really afraid of the dark…but afraid of the light. We fear the shift, the transformation of our souls. We want to stay the same and have everyone around us change for our greater happiness. Searching your own soul can bring you closer to the light.
These are some questions to ponder. Know that you may need to wrestle with change in order to have a peaceful night sleep.
*I have updated my blog..shorter bits of shared experiences and wisdom with more questions to ponder rather than answers. I hope you give yourself a chance to think about the questions that I raise… I have given much thought to them myself.
Wednesday, May 20, 2009
The Importance of Guides
I've played tennis since I was in Jr. High (that's what they called it back then!)...not competitively, but just for fun. I learned to play with my friends and family at summer camp and from my husband, Kenny, who was on the tennis team in High School. I was given many tips, pointers and a few lessons along the way. A few years ago, I started playing tennis more often. I wanted to play more competitively in leagues and on a team, so I needed to really improve my game. I wanted to be a better player and I knew I was not at my true potential. I felt "stuck" in my old tennis patterns. I decided to take lessons and get more serious. I hired a tennis instructor, and every week, I worked on changing my game. At first, I did not know what needed to be changed. I couldn’t see what I was doing wrong. I thought my strokes were working for me, but the tennis pro saw something different. He explained to me how my old patterns worked, but not effectively, and showed me how I could improve. At first, I was frustrated and sometimes angry at myself for not being able to “get it”. During my lessons, my body and mind were not together and, I would return to my old patterns; the old ways felt more comfortable. It seemed impossible to change my strokes, but I persisted and worked through the process, completing the new strokes enough times to change my form. More practice, more lessons would make my change complete and with each new stroke, I became a better player.
I am giving this example of tennis, strictly as a metaphor for personal transformation. We all have the capability of transforming our inner selves in the same way as we can transform ourselves physically. “Patterns of the soul” are what I call our protections or blocks. Every one of us has the ability, if we choose to, improve ourselves by changing them.
~What are our patterns?
Patterns are created from our life situations or experiences. Each one of us has created patterns to use to connect to others in our everyday relationships. The patterns that we develop helps us “play the game of life” and gives us our unique way of responding to family, friends, business associates and the world at large. But, throughout our lives, as we grow emotionally, physically and mentally, the patterns that we have created may not work effectively for us anymore. In fact, they actually prevent us from moving forward and feeling joy, love and peace within ourselves.
Here is an example of myself: As a child, I received a huge amount of praise from my parents. You would think this is a good way to parent….it is loving and kind. But, I interpreted this message as I had to be “the best” in order to be loved. The pattern I created was trying to be “the best” at everything I did. This pattern actually protected me from the fear of failure. I equated failure to not being loved. But, as I became more aware of this pattern, and worked on my inner strength and power with a guide, I realized that trying to be “the best” was not helping me at all…it was actually blocking me from connecting to those around me and to myself in a true way.
~Where do patterns come from?
They come from the messages we receive. We cannot blame our parents because they received similar messages or had different experiences or situations that they interpreted. They created their own patterns to protect themselves. My mother was a holocaust survivor and my father came from a poor immigrant family. They had extremely difficult childhoods and they always wanted the best for me. We pass down our genetic makeup….we also pass down our messages… wouldn’t it be wonderful to change some of the patterns that are created and start anew? Think of a re-birth of the person that you really are.
~How do we change the patterns?
Do you feel stuck at times, but don’t know why? Is it difficult to recognize our own patterns? Yes, we are blind to them. Just like the tennis instructor taught me a new way of hitting the ball …an effective guide can help anyone see and understand the patterns that have been created in their lives. Make sure, if you find a guide for a body, mind or spirit experience, that they are guiding you with love and with your best interest at heart. Positive and uplifting relationships are vital to the process.
Do you believe that people cannot change their ways? Can patterns or ingrained behaviors be changed? I believe…. YES… they can. I have seen it and experienced it myself. I have gone through, and continue to be on, a journey of transformation where I have become more joyful in my everyday life. In my experience, changing the patterns of the soul is “encountering the light” It can be a conscious decision, or, at times, brought on by unusual circumstances*. Use a guide, explore yourself and maybe, in the near future, you will be able to play your best game yet!
* Have you witnessed people change their ways when they are exposed to dramatic and life altering experiences, for example, a death in the family, an illness, a job loss, a divorce? Maybe these forces happen so that people have the opportunity to change…but wouldn’t it be amazing to push yourself to transform on your own?
Look for my next blog… "Are You Afraid of the Light?"
Monday, May 4, 2009
Soul Journey
I have been given many gifts in my life, but one that I have learned a great deal from…a gift that I never understood why I received it, until a few years ago. I was blessed, fifteen years ago, with identical twins boys. As identical twins, my sons, Adam and Ari, share the exact same DNA because they started as one. They have the same parents, and are living in the same environment, yet they are completely unique individuals; each with their own emotions, personalities and life lessons or self learning “opportunities”. I became aware, when they were very young, that they perceived information differently, and, like then and today, have their own special ways of dealing with challenges, conflicts and relationships. Scientists and psychologists have always studied nature vs. nurture, but I believe that the differences between my twin boys, comes from another dimension…. their souls.
Each person has the opportunity to discover their own soul journey. We all have life lessons that are given to us through experiences and relationships. When we understand and become aware of our life lessons, and work on changing them, we move towards our higher selves. This movement or transformation can be difficult and sometimes painful, but, when we are willing to encounter our truths and walk through the pathway of change, we eventually find peace within ourselves, step by step. There are many ways to start connecting and becoming more aware. Some examples, that have helped me on my journey have been: *meeting and talking with a guide, journaling, writing, yoga, walking, hiking, being in nature, meditation, music, chanting and drumming circles, movement, massage, prayer, studying, reading, contemplating and, especially… spending time alone.
Throughout my years as a student of Jewish literature and Torah, I was taught that the Jewish religion was based on the idea that the Messiah will come when there is peace in the world and the Temple of Jerusalem will be built once again. How about a different way of looking at the coming of the Messiah…. Is it possible that the re-building of the Temple is the re-building of ourselves instead? Can we be in a period of a spiritual re-building rather than a physical re-building of this world and that each one of us has the opportunity to create peace and light as individuals and as a collective community? Maybe, if we become more aware, and are able to understand and learn from our life lessons, we will know our souls more fully and have a feeling of oneness and peace. .How wonderful it would be to create Heaven on Earth. You can wait for the Messiah to come….or take the first steps, experience new dimensions… … learn from your life lessons and encounter the light.
*Look for my next blog, "The Importance of Guides."
I have changed my business e-mail address..it is now Andrea@encounterthelight.com
Each person has the opportunity to discover their own soul journey. We all have life lessons that are given to us through experiences and relationships. When we understand and become aware of our life lessons, and work on changing them, we move towards our higher selves. This movement or transformation can be difficult and sometimes painful, but, when we are willing to encounter our truths and walk through the pathway of change, we eventually find peace within ourselves, step by step. There are many ways to start connecting and becoming more aware. Some examples, that have helped me on my journey have been: *meeting and talking with a guide, journaling, writing, yoga, walking, hiking, being in nature, meditation, music, chanting and drumming circles, movement, massage, prayer, studying, reading, contemplating and, especially… spending time alone.
Throughout my years as a student of Jewish literature and Torah, I was taught that the Jewish religion was based on the idea that the Messiah will come when there is peace in the world and the Temple of Jerusalem will be built once again. How about a different way of looking at the coming of the Messiah…. Is it possible that the re-building of the Temple is the re-building of ourselves instead? Can we be in a period of a spiritual re-building rather than a physical re-building of this world and that each one of us has the opportunity to create peace and light as individuals and as a collective community? Maybe, if we become more aware, and are able to understand and learn from our life lessons, we will know our souls more fully and have a feeling of oneness and peace. .How wonderful it would be to create Heaven on Earth. You can wait for the Messiah to come….or take the first steps, experience new dimensions… … learn from your life lessons and encounter the light.
*Look for my next blog, "The Importance of Guides."
I have changed my business e-mail address..it is now Andrea@encounterthelight.com
Monday, April 6, 2009
Truth Through Questions
This week is Passover for the Jewish people. All over the world, Jews will be sitting at a seder table with their family and friends and asking the four questions…
The question that came to my mind is…Why do we ask questions at all? Why don’t we just read the Haggadah, the traditional book of the order of the seder, say the prayers and tell the story of Passover? Maybe the purpose of Passover is not only to tell the story or understand the holiday’s meaning, but the actual act of asking the questions. This way of thinking is the opposite of what we have always believed. The questions in the Haggadah do not only have to be understood in the literal form, but asked in order to contemplate the answers and to be a pathway for the truth. I believe this also applies to the Torah. The Torah is a coded guidebook that was written for the Jewish people not to be told the answers, but to find the truth within ourselves by asking the questions. Is it possible that the higher power in the universe wants us to dig deep into our own souls and find the answers to the questions that are posed to us on Passover and every day of our lives? By contemplating and thinking of our own answers in regards to ourselves, we have the ability to grow and transform, lift our spiritual selves and create holiness. If we only gain knowledge by what others tell us… it is knowledge for knowledge sake. It has no purpose. Knowledge only has purpose when we create an opportunity to grow from it. Through asking questions and contemplating our own answers, we can understand the truth within ourselves.
I have some questions for you that I have asked myself. They are not questions about the Passover holiday rituals, but about the core of what the holiday represents; the feeling of slavery within ourselves which is universal for all human beings. Our logical response today is….we don’t think of ourselves as slaves at all! We feel free in our lives, living in America, having freedom of religion, having freedom to work and play in the way that we choose, but we need to ask ourselves a deeper question: are we in bondage in our own souls? How do we free ourselves form the worries, concerns and frustrations of everyday life? How do we make decisions that have positive outcomes all the time? How do we find peace within hearts and in our relationships with each other?
Here are some questions that I will be writing about in my future blog. They are for you to think about, if you choose. They are questions about our inner selves and our relationships with others, especially with our own family members.
· Are we blind to our own issues? Do we need guides to help us see the truth about ourselves?
· Are our spouse’s “mirrors” of our own life lessons? When we become angry with their actions or behaviors, can we see what we need to change about ourselves…or do we always think that “if they would only change the way he/she is doing that…it would be fine?
· How can our children be so much like us, and the opposite of us as well? How are some of our children more like us and the other ones more like our spouse? Is it all genetics? What life lessons are they learning from us, and what are we learning from them?
· Why are there various expectations put on us by our parents in regard to birth order or gender? Why can’t relationships be more balanced between the members in our family?
· Do we act out of fear or love within our relationships? Do we try to make others happy, for example, because we are afraid that they won’t love us if we don’t? Or do we act out of a place of mutual happiness between each other and take actions that benefit both people involved?
· Are we afraid of change? Are we afraid of our own power? Are we afraid of loss? Are we afraid of love?
For those of you that celebrate Passover…have a wonderful and thought provoking seder!
Andrea
The question that came to my mind is…Why do we ask questions at all? Why don’t we just read the Haggadah, the traditional book of the order of the seder, say the prayers and tell the story of Passover? Maybe the purpose of Passover is not only to tell the story or understand the holiday’s meaning, but the actual act of asking the questions. This way of thinking is the opposite of what we have always believed. The questions in the Haggadah do not only have to be understood in the literal form, but asked in order to contemplate the answers and to be a pathway for the truth. I believe this also applies to the Torah. The Torah is a coded guidebook that was written for the Jewish people not to be told the answers, but to find the truth within ourselves by asking the questions. Is it possible that the higher power in the universe wants us to dig deep into our own souls and find the answers to the questions that are posed to us on Passover and every day of our lives? By contemplating and thinking of our own answers in regards to ourselves, we have the ability to grow and transform, lift our spiritual selves and create holiness. If we only gain knowledge by what others tell us… it is knowledge for knowledge sake. It has no purpose. Knowledge only has purpose when we create an opportunity to grow from it. Through asking questions and contemplating our own answers, we can understand the truth within ourselves.
I have some questions for you that I have asked myself. They are not questions about the Passover holiday rituals, but about the core of what the holiday represents; the feeling of slavery within ourselves which is universal for all human beings. Our logical response today is….we don’t think of ourselves as slaves at all! We feel free in our lives, living in America, having freedom of religion, having freedom to work and play in the way that we choose, but we need to ask ourselves a deeper question: are we in bondage in our own souls? How do we free ourselves form the worries, concerns and frustrations of everyday life? How do we make decisions that have positive outcomes all the time? How do we find peace within hearts and in our relationships with each other?
Here are some questions that I will be writing about in my future blog. They are for you to think about, if you choose. They are questions about our inner selves and our relationships with others, especially with our own family members.
· Are we blind to our own issues? Do we need guides to help us see the truth about ourselves?
· Are our spouse’s “mirrors” of our own life lessons? When we become angry with their actions or behaviors, can we see what we need to change about ourselves…or do we always think that “if they would only change the way he/she is doing that…it would be fine?
· How can our children be so much like us, and the opposite of us as well? How are some of our children more like us and the other ones more like our spouse? Is it all genetics? What life lessons are they learning from us, and what are we learning from them?
· Why are there various expectations put on us by our parents in regard to birth order or gender? Why can’t relationships be more balanced between the members in our family?
· Do we act out of fear or love within our relationships? Do we try to make others happy, for example, because we are afraid that they won’t love us if we don’t? Or do we act out of a place of mutual happiness between each other and take actions that benefit both people involved?
· Are we afraid of change? Are we afraid of our own power? Are we afraid of loss? Are we afraid of love?
For those of you that celebrate Passover…have a wonderful and thought provoking seder!
Andrea
Monday, March 23, 2009
My Journey
We all have a path to our lives…. we don’t always know why we are on them until we discover the reason. I have led a journey, like everyone else, with two different roads that lead to one path. The first journey is obvious; it is the one that everyone can see..It’s the outside journey. My journey started with having what looked like amazing parents (they were in their own way!). I was… a bright student, popular and active in all types of activities and organizations…cheerleader, Senior Class Vice President, theater and dance, camp counselor and religious school teacher… a graduate from UCLA, Sorority board member, Camp Director, and successful business woman…a responsible and loving Mom, homemaker, and a wife of over 20 years…. a major contributor of time and money to Jewish Schools, an effective fundraiser and board member for many organizations.
BUT, this is not my entire story. Underneath it all, I felt unhappy…not all the time, I had wonderful moments and occasions in my life, but I had a sense of anxiety, fear, and some depression…a feeling of unhappiness. I never understood why. It seemed as though I had it all!!! At least it looked like I had it all....even to myself, but I didn’t feel content inside.
The understanding of my inside journey really starts at the age of 20 when I could no longer sleep. “Insomnia” it was called and I didn’t know why!? I would lay awake with anxiety all night long…fear of the future…of what was ahead of me in my life. I was given a name of a therapist, a wonderful man who was a Freudian analyst. This time together was the beginning of my journey into self -development… what I call the attainment of the “Higher Self”. I was in analysis for 17 years; examining my dreams and acknowledging my unconscious. I was probably aware of my issues more than anyone I knew my age and older, but, although awareness helped me move through my busy and successful life week by week, I still didn’t feel content or completely grateful. Therapy did not “transform” me. When I “graduated” therapy (as we called it), it was as if I had received my PHD in psychology… 17 years of studying my mind and my relationships. I used my work to become a better parent, friend and wife, but I was still not feeling content within myself.
Ken and I were involved in YPO (Young Presidents Organization) when we were in our late 30’s. We decided, after he had sold his business “It’s All Greek to Me” and didn’t know what to do with his life, to attend a “Members in Transition” seminar for a week in Boulder, Colorado. We didn’t know what we were getting into at the time, but we became involved in Shadow Work, a fascinating process, based on Carl Jung’s practices, of looking at shadows or blocks and clearing them in a process of role- playing and childhood regression exercises. I learned so fast and soon I was clearing my inner blocks myself and taking week long courses to become a facilitator. I became a certified Shadow Work Facilitator and, again, practiced my knowledge on family and friends. I found the Shadow Work process to be much more helpful than my therapy in a shorter amount of time, but it wasn’t completely right for me to practice professionally. I was still busy with my “other”, more successful life.
Throughout all of these years of self- development, I found myself wanting to learn more and more. I am a true “Student of Life”. My passion is Education, and because I experienced Jewish education through my up-bringing, and now with my own children, I delved into studying my religion’s rituals and beliefs, interpretations of the Torah and the writings of the Sages. I studied continuously for over 10 years with many great Rabbi’s and scholars. I taught, like my Father, who had been a teacher for over 45 years, as a Jewish Family Educator and Parent Discussion Group Leader. Through these experiences and by attending and participating in many hours of lectures, classes and seminars and workshops, I became more spiritually aware.
I then found a spiritual guide in Los Angeles that launched me to new heights, as I continued to clear more of my own blocks (also known as defenders, protections of the heart etc…). An example of these blocks can be anger, feeling competitive or envious, low self-esteem and never feeling “good enough”. These are messages that anyone can create by experiencing different patterns in their family life and experiences. I had my own patterns that were created by my own messages.
Throughout all of my experiences, I have now become clear of many of my blocks. I am able to help others now on their path. I am finally in my “Higher Self” and I continue to work on myself daily and grow to be the best I can be. The results of my work are that I sleep every night, do not feel anxious, and have physical health and well being. I truly feel blessed, but the work has been difficult. There have been times, when I was going through my many changes, and it felt endless. I wanted to quit and literally die….but I found the strength to carry on. I have found that it takes pain, sacrifice and struggle to fully grow, but the rewards are great, if you can face the challenges.
I have recently received a certificate as a Guided Imagery Facilitator. I use this practice along with questions and exercises, written by my husband and myself, and other tools from Ancient Jewish Mysticism to help individuals discover their true intentions and create affirmations that can be fulfilled if they choose to do so.
My goal now is to create more connection between people. By helping individuals find their true selves, they can build closer, more intimate relationships; the key to contentment and happiness.
Through my Wisdom Circles and/or Personal Guidance Sessions, anyone can become clearer, more true and have more loving and intimate relationships.
That is my journey…of course….to be continued!!!! What is your Journey?
BUT, this is not my entire story. Underneath it all, I felt unhappy…not all the time, I had wonderful moments and occasions in my life, but I had a sense of anxiety, fear, and some depression…a feeling of unhappiness. I never understood why. It seemed as though I had it all!!! At least it looked like I had it all....even to myself, but I didn’t feel content inside.
The understanding of my inside journey really starts at the age of 20 when I could no longer sleep. “Insomnia” it was called and I didn’t know why!? I would lay awake with anxiety all night long…fear of the future…of what was ahead of me in my life. I was given a name of a therapist, a wonderful man who was a Freudian analyst. This time together was the beginning of my journey into self -development… what I call the attainment of the “Higher Self”. I was in analysis for 17 years; examining my dreams and acknowledging my unconscious. I was probably aware of my issues more than anyone I knew my age and older, but, although awareness helped me move through my busy and successful life week by week, I still didn’t feel content or completely grateful. Therapy did not “transform” me. When I “graduated” therapy (as we called it), it was as if I had received my PHD in psychology… 17 years of studying my mind and my relationships. I used my work to become a better parent, friend and wife, but I was still not feeling content within myself.
Ken and I were involved in YPO (Young Presidents Organization) when we were in our late 30’s. We decided, after he had sold his business “It’s All Greek to Me” and didn’t know what to do with his life, to attend a “Members in Transition” seminar for a week in Boulder, Colorado. We didn’t know what we were getting into at the time, but we became involved in Shadow Work, a fascinating process, based on Carl Jung’s practices, of looking at shadows or blocks and clearing them in a process of role- playing and childhood regression exercises. I learned so fast and soon I was clearing my inner blocks myself and taking week long courses to become a facilitator. I became a certified Shadow Work Facilitator and, again, practiced my knowledge on family and friends. I found the Shadow Work process to be much more helpful than my therapy in a shorter amount of time, but it wasn’t completely right for me to practice professionally. I was still busy with my “other”, more successful life.
Throughout all of these years of self- development, I found myself wanting to learn more and more. I am a true “Student of Life”. My passion is Education, and because I experienced Jewish education through my up-bringing, and now with my own children, I delved into studying my religion’s rituals and beliefs, interpretations of the Torah and the writings of the Sages. I studied continuously for over 10 years with many great Rabbi’s and scholars. I taught, like my Father, who had been a teacher for over 45 years, as a Jewish Family Educator and Parent Discussion Group Leader. Through these experiences and by attending and participating in many hours of lectures, classes and seminars and workshops, I became more spiritually aware.
I then found a spiritual guide in Los Angeles that launched me to new heights, as I continued to clear more of my own blocks (also known as defenders, protections of the heart etc…). An example of these blocks can be anger, feeling competitive or envious, low self-esteem and never feeling “good enough”. These are messages that anyone can create by experiencing different patterns in their family life and experiences. I had my own patterns that were created by my own messages.
Throughout all of my experiences, I have now become clear of many of my blocks. I am able to help others now on their path. I am finally in my “Higher Self” and I continue to work on myself daily and grow to be the best I can be. The results of my work are that I sleep every night, do not feel anxious, and have physical health and well being. I truly feel blessed, but the work has been difficult. There have been times, when I was going through my many changes, and it felt endless. I wanted to quit and literally die….but I found the strength to carry on. I have found that it takes pain, sacrifice and struggle to fully grow, but the rewards are great, if you can face the challenges.
I have recently received a certificate as a Guided Imagery Facilitator. I use this practice along with questions and exercises, written by my husband and myself, and other tools from Ancient Jewish Mysticism to help individuals discover their true intentions and create affirmations that can be fulfilled if they choose to do so.
My goal now is to create more connection between people. By helping individuals find their true selves, they can build closer, more intimate relationships; the key to contentment and happiness.
Through my Wisdom Circles and/or Personal Guidance Sessions, anyone can become clearer, more true and have more loving and intimate relationships.
That is my journey…of course….to be continued!!!! What is your Journey?
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
